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Is Work Where It's Hitting Hardest?
You're managing it everywhere else, or trying to. But work is where it really shows.The meeting where the word you needed just wasn't there. The wave of heat that hits right as you're trying to concentrate. Snapping at someone over something small, then spending the rest of the day feeling terrible about it.
Getting through the day on sheer effort, then having nothing left for anyone once you're home.
If any of that sounds familiar, you're not imagining it, and you're not failing at your job. Something real is happening in your body, and it's landing hardest in the place you can least afford it to.
It's not just in your head
Hormonal changes in midlife, whether that's perimenopause, menopause, or andropause, affect far more than the things people usually talk about. Focus, memory, mood, sleep, patience, energy. All of it runs on the same underlying chemistry, and when that chemistry shifts, work is often where the cracks show first, simply because it's where you're expected to perform on demand, in front of other people, on a schedule you don't control.
None of this is a character flaw. It's biology, and there are things that genuinely help.
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What support could actually look like
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A confidential conversation, just to talk it through with someone who understands what's happening physically, not just emotionally - that could be your manager, once they have had some training
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Help figuring out what to actually ask for, at work or at home, when you don't have the words yet
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Practical tools you can use straight away, not just an explanation of what's wrong
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Knowing you don't have to have it all figured out before you reach out
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Understanding what is happening to you as well, a clearer picture of the changes in your body
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What you can do to support yourself
What would help you most right now?
Want to talk it through privately first?
Sometimes it helps to understand what's going on before you say anything to anyone else. A private, one-to-one conversation is a good place to start.
[Find out about 1-2-1 support]
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Want your workplace to actually offer this kind of support?
If you think your employer would take this seriously, you don't have to make the case yourself. Here's a short message you can send to HR or your manager, just to open the door​​
A message you could send
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Copy this, change anything that doesn't sound like you, and send it as an email or in person.
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Hi [manager's name],
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I wanted to flag something I've been finding hard, and I think it might be worth us talking about. I've been dealing with some symptoms connected to [menopause / andropause / hormonal changes] that are affecting me at work - mostly [focus / energy / mood - pick whichever fits, or leave this vague].
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I've come across a local practitioner, Rhu Strand, who runs training and support specifically around this for workplaces. I'm not asking for anything specific right now, I just wanted to put it on your radar.
Would you be open to having a quick look at what she offers, or maybe having an initial call with her yourself?
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Her website is: https://www.rhustrand.co.uk/workplace-wellness-consultancy if that's useful.
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Thanks for reading this.
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[Your name]
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A shorter version, if that suits you better
For a text, Slack message, or a quick in-person mention.
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Hi [manager's name], can I have a quick chat sometime this week?
I've been struggling with some hormone-related stuff that's affecting me at work, and I've found someone local (Rhu Strand, www.rhustrand.co.uk/workplace-wellness-consultancy) who does training and support around this for workplaces.
No pressure, just wanted to flag it.
You don't have to do anything with this today. It's here if and when you need it.​​
Gosport, UK
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